momentary inspiration

Trust in your ability to thrive.

homework

i received a homework assignment tonite...

i suggest you try it too...

watch this... and dance your heart out...

"Get up offa that thing,
and shake 'till you feel better,
Get up offa that thing,
and try to release that pressure!"

just look at that man get down!
c stands for crazy dancin' fool,
c.

summoning the courage

The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain. Is not the cup that holds your wine the very cup that was burned in the potter's oven? And is not the lute that soothes your spirit, the very wood that was hollowed with knives?
- Kahlil Gibran

Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy.
- Dale Carnegie

Don't die without embracing the daring adventure your life is meant to be. You may go broke. You may experience failure and rejection repeatedly. You may endure multiple dysfunctional relationships. But these are all milestones along the path of a life lived courageously. They are your private victories, carving a deeper space within you to be filled with an abundance of joy, happiness, and fulfillment. So go ahead and feel the fear - then summon the courage to follow your dreams anyway. That is strength undefeatable.

from Courage - by Steve Pavlina

thought of the week

i repeatedly doodle 2 main themes:

water droplets
or
sunshines

lately, it's lots of rain drops
so i appreciated this:

"Some of the world's greatest meditators have cried a lot." - Sakyong Mipham

in true irony, i just started a book by him on Sunday...
c.

how do you know?

i paint sometimes
and they say
(yep - "them," again ;)
the hardest part is knowing when the canvas is done
knowing when to step back & walk away
im struggling with that right now
knowing when to walk away
when do you admit something just isn't working out?
how long do you try?
how do you know you're not quitting or giving up?
what if you stay at it too long & injure yourself?
yoga teaches me to stay in the pose
ride out the discomfort and see what lies beneath
"the pose begins when you want to come out of it"
but it also teaches me compassion - first & foremost, for myself
you'd think i'd know how to discern by now...
i'm strong enough not to compromise myself & my ideals
yet i'm starting to feel like i'm losing parts of myself
and i'm most unhappy about that
this whole venture is starting to feel like a relationship that
"just isn't working out"
that inner voice has started up and just wont quiet
so i ask - and im truly asking - any & all input appreciated
how do you know?
until i hear from you, i offer it up
b/c that's all i know how to do
that - and pay attention.
head bowed,
c.

and it poked me

i tried acupuncture. it went a little somethin' like this:
the first session is a bit more analysis than a typical session...
ive never been to a shrink, so sitting & talking before the needles came out, put me into witness-consciousness a bit - i was watching myself & amazed by the verbal answers that came out of me in response to her to simple questions about how i was faring in life.
perhaps i should talk to myself more often? ;)
humor aside, perhaps i should check in with how i'm faring more often... compassionately, realistically, sensitively.
here's where it gets a bit bizarre - (imagine that on my blog ;)
i had a bit of consternation that the needles would hurt but i barely felt them at all - in my back anyways. those ones in the top of the foot (meant to activate the liver in my case) were not comfortable. all the needles used are actually so hair-thin that you dont feel much. some she had to tell me were inserted. i really wished i'd taken a camera to get a pic of my back - i think i had 14? total, along either side of the spine. it does feel very good, soothing in an energetic way. i felt pops & releases under the skin, which i've felt before when ive had energy work done.
she was noticing some things about my lungs. having heard that certain emotions are connected to each of the organs, i asked what this indicated. she said lots of mucus or lung issues are a sign of grief. as opposed to sadness, grief occurs suddenly & w/o warning. i started leaking when she said it was as though i had lost my connection to something.
and to some degree i have lost connections. obviously i no longer live in the city i call home, so that connection is broken - but the emotional ties to everyone are not. and nothing - not even death - can break this strong bond i've formed with Divinity. tat tvam asi (i am That.) i think my initial tears were a response to the thought of losing these connections - but i realize that bonds to my God & my home are bonds that can't break.
she told me afterwards that chinese medicine treats the whole patient & isnt a means of relieving symptoms w/o addressing underlying problems. she didnt totally remove my shoulder pain, and i have sense that she could have. so it creates an interesting quandary that i havent yet worked out - do i trust that it will take multiple sessions (i do) but do i want to pay $70 for each return session, recommended every 10 days (i dont). does the american in me desire instant gratification that will immediately remove the hurt (i do) while the yogini in me would much rather address the problem rather than the symptom & respects that there is no quick fix for problems that have emerged over time (yes, again.)
and so it continues. i pay attention.
c.

water & wine

photos from last weekend's water and wine tour to niagara falls, canada & niagara-on-the-lake wineries:














whole lotta water... mist can be seen for miles around... my morning observation, looking out the hotel window: 'hey, the falls are still on...'


















i took this picture b/c we suspected that the people in the boat couldn't see the rainbow from their angle looking into the sun, and thus were totally unaware to be passing beneath one... i think i spend a lot of my life similarly unaware of all the rainbows above me...

my Niagara Falls review... b/c you always here people say "the canadian side is waaaay better than the american side." :p per my usual position, i disagree with the majority. on the NY side, you are standing directly above the falls. more mist. more power beneath your feet. take your shoes off and rest the soles of your feet on the bare ground. feel the vibration of Nature from the soles of your feet along your spine to the top of your head. stand alongside the river and watch the rapids race by you. head to the canadian side and view it from a distance. so pretty. so far away. so removed. ok, and quite misty. im much more in favor of the interactive experience, as opposed to the sightseeing.

downtown niagara falls canada is a bit too vegas, chain restaurant, new mall construction for this girl... but the greenspace & streetscaping around their parks & walkways is gorgeous.














ever onward. after the vegas lights of downtown niagara falls, the quaintness of downtown niagara-on-the-lake and the scattered wineries is so great.


























stratus winery was amazing, and wins the honor of my blog commercial & recommendation. more of a boutique winery - both style & service here surpassed any of the others we attended - they produce small quantities of high quality wine. they laid us out at this long table in their tasting room, overlooking the vineyard and brought us all kinds of yummy wines. the building is silver LEED certified. very cool. even better - they have bike racks out front and offer discounts for cyclists. my kinda place. they are about to ramp up their production and nervous they won't move it so help them out!














the incubator room at stratus ;) they import each barrel from france - b/c french oak gives a better vanilla taste than american oak, i believe. and each barrel is ridiculously expensive... ~$1000/ea & used for 4 years.


















vineyard education when my introverted side came out and i took off for a solo vineyard tour. not photographed: the ridiculous amount of fruit files. whew! (taken at konzelmann's winery)
















why it's called niagara on the lake... again, observed during my solo vineyard excursions when drunk people & wine tasting started to bore me.

i would definitely return... but i would stay in niagara-on-the-lake... not downtown.

believin' in miracles,
c.

a yoga love letter

cold yoga studio
on this fall night
5 layers of clothes
and still cold
mat space on the frosty hardwood
alongside the fireplace
heat doesnt (yet) penetrate these cold bones
gently begin moving
waking the body up
creaking cracking 100 year old house body
gently warming
then suddenly
ananda - bliss
flying high
body limber & elastic
"make the pose work for you"
remembering briefly what this is all about
mind sinking
as body warms
and releases it
into blackness quiet calm serenity
resting while moving
take the mind out of it
and let the body move
euphoria remains
grin plastered
how did i function before i found this respite?