year(s) in review

NYT did a story yesterday on week 52, reporting on the many employees that will be asked to take the last week of the year off to save on building costs, etc. i especially caught the line talking about using week 52 for personal year end review & contemplation. as i plan my holiday schedule, im finding that i really need such a week of year end introspection.

i started blogging in 2004. apparently, end of the year review always makes me write... a brief retrospective...

year end 2005: busting wide open
my heart is bursting... what a year. missing friends, looking at all that compassion and other centeredness has garnered me in the past 6 months... i am insanely grateful.

in the coming year, allow me to
be unafraid to love
be willing to put myself out there to help others in need
to witness when people need teaching and assistance
to put myself behind the betterment of others
to enjoy my time, my moments, my gifts and my trials
to accept, love, forgive, and be patient with myself

year end 2006: out with the old... and in with the new
excerpt: "...perhaps god's way of watching me slide and throwing me some kind of bone to keep me on this path? i dunno... and though i havent achieved the goal, i am aware that i AM farther along the path, and that's an amazing, if albiet fleeting, realization. a year ago, i would not have reacted as i have. but it goes back to what i said/believe that you can't "know" and choose to live otherwise and thus my choice was made."

year end 2007: the year of measured response
i feel like im not going to be able to call the shots in o8, quite like i have in o7.
this proved true at 9am new years day
and ive been attempting to roll with it since
surrender and ease.

year end 2008: trust & let go
i generally make decisions too quickly, w/o weighing all the options & consequences. i don't necessarily think i would change this about myself, as i intuitively believe in divine guidance & this approach keeps the journey interesting. never mind that it's turned out pretty great thus far... :)
that said, i feel like i've spent 2008 overly focused on my career. its not a life facet that i purport to care significantly about, and yet it's been the major motivating factor behind much of what i've done in '08.
i feel that new focus will emerge in '09 & im hopeful about that - new journeys, new challenges. i pray for: the ability to surrender the fear keeping me in this safety net, & opportunities to do the best work possible.
ive put physical distance between myself & much of my support network... i think subliminally clearing the way for intense svadyaya (scriptural or self-study). i want this conduit as clear, clean, bright, and open as possible!

here's to 2009: the year i leap...

ever brighter light,
c.